Life…crazy but lovely!

Well to say this month has had it’s challenges is an understatement but things are going good…so many things have happened!!!

Dalton is 1!!! I will write a whole post on his party but it was great and I can’t believe I have a 1 year old!!! All those years of dreaming and praying and hoping and here he is beautiful, intelligent, and vibrant! I am so lucky to be his mother! I love him so very much!

This week we finally got the carpet installed in his room, the painting finished, and we’ve been turning Adin’s room into a teenagers room instead of a little boys room! It’s been chaotic, sad, and exciting all at the same time!

Red and I went on our fist baby free date to celebrate our anniversary! It was just what we needed! My lovely husband took me to dinner, and then we had some drinks while bowling which was perfect. I mean I am absolutely terrible at bowling but I always have a blast, whether thats because of Red, or the drinks or the wonderful combination, haha… Either way it was the perfect way to celebrate our anniversary! It was wonderful!!!!

Our eldest son celebrated his 19th birthday, which is scary to think about but hopefully from now on he’ll start making better choices, and make the next year much better than this one was for him… 

I’ve been thinking a little bit about doing another round of IVF but it doesn’t consume me like it used to… I think that’s because I’m super busy, but also because Dalton so wonderfully fills the whole in my heart that infertility had placed there… I would still love to give him a sibling close in age to grow up with, but I’ve done a great job of sticking to my new years resolution, of living in the now instead of living today to get where I want tomorrow…

Don’t get me wrong I’m very much a goal driven person. But focusing on the right now has been wonderful in so many ways! This summer escape was a great reminder to me to focus on the positive and live in the right now!!!  I’ve been doing pretty good too!

I’m finally half way done with my semester and feeling like I’m finally getting the hang of this crazy schedule!!!! Next week, I have an interview. Decided that it’s time for me to start a very minimal hour work schedule… I’m interviewing to become a substitute teacher and you are only required to work 2 days a month to keep your lic. active. I don’t have classes on Fridays, and most the time won’t with my college schedule, so this way I will be able to work one day a week. I’ll be able to get my foot in the door to becoming a teacher. I will meet tons of fellow teachers and principles which will really help me out for when I’m ready to become a teacher! I hope I can get hired on ASAP so that I can put some money aside for Christmas! I already got Dalton his presents, just want to get him some socks ( a tradition in our house), but I still have everyone else to worry about.

Later that same day I have a big math exam! SO hopefully I will do well at both things… Luckily that night I will get to have fun with Dalton’s first Halloween!!!  Well I am exhausted so I’m going to end this, but I miss writing so I wanted to get it all out!

 

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Finally getting this juggling Act down

Well my semester is halfway over and I finally feel like I’m starting to get this juggling act down. I pretty much stopped sleep training all together, but that’s because Dalton started sleeping through the night as long as he was in my bed.

 I need sleep to function at school so I gave up the sleep training just to get a few hours sleep. I still put him to bed in the crib in the beginning of the night but by about midnight he is in my bed.

 I’m hoping to have his room finished before Thanksgiving that way we can start transitioning towards the bedroom. Then when I go on winter break and I don’t need to use my brain we are going to start sleep training in his bedroom. I’m hoping that before spring semester starts he will be sleeping in his room all night. Fingers crossed that my wishes not too crazy.

 I have two more assignments to get done this week and I am finished. One is a huge assignment and the other is a quick quiz online. I’m hoping to have them cleat completed by tomorrow night.

 Saturday I’m hoping to finish painting after I get Dalton party stuff ready. we are keeping the party small just a few friends and family. Normally I do parties at my house but this year we are doing it at the park. The weather is beautiful right now and I don’t have time to get my house cleaned for the party. My house is not a disaster area but I’m not ready to have a party here either. That would be more work then just going to the park.

 I can’t believe Dalton is going to be one on Sunday. I’ll do a whole nother post about his birthday and how wonderful and crazy this year then.

 The last two weeks have been crazy. Between midterms, large projects, painting, hey and my oldest stepson getting into trouble and planning a birthday I’m pretty sure that once this week is over I will be able to handle anything the rest of this semester can bring. I really hope things only get better from here

Rough week!

WTF is a perfect way to start this!

Being a mom is hard y’all… my oldest has been making bad choices lately and I’ve gained 10 years in the last week alone! I’m not going to get into all the details but I’m terrified of the path he’s on I’m terrified that were going to lose him to his bad choices…

I hope this week has opened his eyes but only time will tell! I’m beyond exhausted not just physically but mentally too! I’m so beat I just want to take a mini vacation!

However, I’m not going to be able to do that! So instead, I’m taking it one day at a time, one crisis at a time. I want to smack my oldest and then hug him, I want to yell at him and then cry! I don’t plan on actually doing that but I’m angry, and heartbroken over the choices he is currently making… I fear that the road he’s on only leads to bad places that he will hate himself for going down! Right now it sucks! but I also know that some of this is out of my control… So When I get the chance I will tell him whats on my mind and in my heart and then let it go… I’m sure that if things go worse I will feel the same way I feel now but right now I don’t want to think about that I want to focus on the now and what I can control…

So this week is my midterm week with multiple big projects due, and Dalton’s 1st birthday to plan! Instead of letting myself drown in the stress of everything, especially my oldest ones bad choices I’m going to just focus on my school and my youngest son!

I bought a cute little onesie for DAlton to wear, I’ve already bought all of the presents, I just need to bake the cupcakes and I want to get a few balloons, and prep the baby activity area and the party is ready to go…

I need to finish my 3 big projects for this week at school still. Tomorrow I plan to get a ton of stuff done and I’m hoping I can get a lot done so that by this weekend I’m able to just focus on the party! Saturday we are going to a carpet store to see if we can find some carpet for my boys bedrooms because the carpet is 20 years old and pretty beat up! So I’m trying…It’s a lot planned for the week but I’m focusing on one assignment at a time…

 

 

alright brain you can turn off now!

I’m sitting here ( I should be asleep) but instead I’m stuck on pinterest trying to plan out a birthday party for a little boy who will never remember it!

I know this party is more for me than him but I really want a few specific things…like a sugar free cake so far little man has only had sugar from fruits and no added sugars and I’m not ready to give that up so now I’m trying to find a healthy sugar free cake that taste good! If anyone has any good recipes I’m all ears 🙂

So far out of the recipes I’ve found I’m thinking of trying a carrot cake that looks pretty good…. I can mix up some blueberries into puree for a frosting and wala…no hopefully it works out that well lol

I think we are going to keep it small and only invite family…still debating on if I want to send out invites to friends too…not sure yet…but it’s going to be at the park after his morning nap and then cake, presents and play then call it done…we were talking about bbq some hot dogs but honestly with it being his first bday party I don’t think we need to make it very long…

so I think if I make a couple dozen cupcakes and then do the party at the park it will be fine…it’ll probably take me longer to set up then it will to do the party lol…

Tomorrow me and my bestie will be planning out the party details and trying to make a few cakes… fun… well I’m off to bed hopefully to a nice restful night!

Finally…

Well my TOM (time of month) finally showed up (with a vengeance) and it sucks! I knew it would show up I mean it’s not I magically became fertile or rob got a vasectomy reversal so there really was a extremely small chance that it wouldn’t have shown… This is by far the worst though, I forgot how terrible my cramps could be…

Once I got home from school I put on comfy pants and a loose shirt…so much better! I really want to do absolutely nothing but being a mom of a very active 11 month old (Refuse to call him a toddler yet) makes that impossible. So instead I climbed into his play area on the floor and let him crawl all over me! He had a great time and I was able to lay there in mild misery!

My semester is almost half way over and it has been exhausting…I’m nervous how next semester is going to go but I’m happy that I am getting closer every week done makes me happier that I am a little closer…

So all in all things are going great! Dalton is 11 months old. My grades at school are great right now… I’m so tired but I am balancing it all really well, and that makes me feel good. So now that Dalton is asleep and Red is home from the store I’m going to go enjoy some time with the hubby…